Two years ago this month, I left my husband, shortly before telling him he had 2 weeks to get out of the house for good. It’s been a very long two years, full of pain and struggle and freedom and confusion and finding myself. And finding words.Read More
I’ve been sitting here for a good 10 minutes, just staring at the screen. Occasionally typing a sentence or two, then deleting. The words I want to say aren’t words I feel I can say yet, and so I choose to be silent. Much like I have most of this year, if you’ve noticed. On…Read More
My Mamaw died this past week. It wasn’t altogether unexpected — she’d been in the hospital with pneumonia and various complications related to it for a few weeks. But she’d been getting better. She’d been taken out of the ICU. There was a plan for her recovery. But she died, which just…wasn’t part of the…Read More
I just watched The Fault in Our Stars and I’m having feelings about my dad who is dying (slowly) of cancer.Read More
Michael and I went into a Halloween shop today.
I’d never been in a Halloween shop before, and it was an eye-opening experience.
I was really surprised to see so many little kids everywhere — and not a single one of them crying or scared. These kids…they clearly could separate fiction from reality in a way that I couldn’t at their age. In a way that I couldn’t as a young adult. I envied this ability they had that I’m still working on developing. I envied their lack of fear, their pure delight, their reasoning skills.Read More
Maybe I should have just kept pretending to be a Christian. You know, for the rest of my life. Because lying forever can’t possibly go wrong.Read More
What’s so wrong with attention? Does my wasting body not tell you about my wasting soul? Do the scars on my arms and legs not tell you about the scars on my soul? For the girl with the words, the girl who was going to write books some day, I never ever had the words for the pain. And I still don’t, even though I’ve long left the starving and cutting.Read More
My grandfather passed away this morning. He died in his recliner, coffee cup beside him, half-empty packet of tobacco sticking out of his pocket (with a wad in his mouth), watching the WVU pre-game. Heart attack — his fourth one, though first in over a decade. He was 78 years old.Read More